June 5, 2012

Red Umbrella-Over the Hump

I just checked.  It's been well over a month since a Red Umbrella post appeared on this blog. A month!!  I think this picture about sums it up:

It's gone by in a blur.  I'm now more than halfway done with chemo.  I'll admit it is beginning to wear on me.  A pattern is beginning to emerge.  Treatment = instant reflux.  Food, even water, bounces up and down my innards like some sort of crazed express elevator.  Ever been on the Tower of Terror at Disney's MGM Studios?  Yeah.  It's sort of like that.  It makes sleeping, even sleeping while sitting up, difficult.  Sleep becomes an elusive friend.  At night, my dry mouth glues itself shut and I wake, choking.  No matter how much water I drink I. Don't.  Feel.  Hydrated.  

A week after treatment, the reflux is more under control, but the nausea and the fatigue sets in.  Taking a shower becomes a monumental task.  After 5 or so days of feeling like I'm newly pregnant again and, at times, overwhelmingly exhausted, it's over.  I feel almost normal.  

I'm not complaining.  I'm sharing.  I want others to be able to learn from this experience of mine.  There aren't many resources for pregnant women going through chemo.  This could all be so much worse.  I get that.  I am grateful it is not.

Baby Flynn continues to take it all in stride.  I am amazed.  I am awed.  I cannot wait to hold this little miracle of ours.  As with chemo, we're on the downward slope, being past the halfway point.  

Channing's been busy preparing for the Big Arrival.  He practices on his doll.  The clothes are changed frequently to allow for diaper changes and baths.  His baby is bottled and burped.  And loved.  

My oh my, how this wee one is loved.  It's a sign of what's to come and it makes this mama so very, very proud.  

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